The Pursuit of Happiness
Every client I see has a natural wish and desire to be happy. I believe it is a natural right for all people to be happy, and so this month starts the first of a two-part series on things that we can do to be happier. Simple things that all of us can do every day to make our lives richer and more fulfilling.
1. Start by giving up the need to always be right. This need to be right, all of the time, and never wrong, can destroy relationships and cause much pain and suffering to ourselves and others. Learn to be kind instead of right all of the time and begin to notice that so many things we defend come at a cost. Ask yourself this. Are all of the things that I need to feel right about worth it, and at what cost to myself does this come at.
2. Give up your need for control. We cannot control everything in our lives, people or situations. Begin by allowing everything and everyone to be just how they are and you will begin to see how much better this will make you feel. So often, by focusing on this need to control we miss many opportunities that can create happiness for us.
3. Give up on blaming. Blaming moves us into the victim role. You become weak and powerless. Stop blaming others for everything that happens to you or for what they have done to you. By becoming responsible and accountable for our actions we take back our power and with that, control of our lives and the outcomes. Remember, you are the captain of your ship. You set the course and inevitably you choose your final destination.
4. Stop all negative internal self talk. None of this is healthy or productive for us. Many people are hurting themselves every day because of their negative and repetitive self-defeating mindset. Stop believing the negative things you tell yourself. You are much better than that. Remind yourself daily that you are unique and special and that there is not another you anywhere else on the entire planet. Your it, so start shining brightly and be Happy.
5. Give up your limiting beliefs about what you can or cannot do, what is possible or impossible. Limiting beliefs often keep us stuck in the wrong places. Where we don’t want to be.” a belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind.” Elly Roselle.
6. Stop complaining. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make us sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers these feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the Power of positive thinking.
7. Stop criticizing everyone and everything, including yourself. We are all different, yet very similar. We all want to be happy, to love and be loved. We all want to be understood. We all want something and something is wished by all of us.
8. Stop needing to impress others. Stop trying to be something that you’re not. The moment we stop trying so hard to be something that we are not, we are then able to accept and embrace who we really are and become happier.